Few hours ago I have read with great sadness that Heather Armstrong (Dooce) has passed away. Heather Hamilton, former Armstrong aka Queen of mommy bloggers aka Dooce.
Heather Armstrong former Hamilton gained popularity in the early 2000s for her personal blog, Dooce.com, which chronicled her life as a stay-at-home mother and discussed topics such as motherhood, mental health, religion, depression and relationships.
Heather’s blog dooce.com became widely popular and she quickly became a prominent figure in the blogging world. She was one of the first bloggers to monetize her blog and was able to support herself and her family through advertising revenue and sponsorships.
She was the first ever blogger to be fired over some blog posts and since then the term dooced has come to be used more broadly to describe situations in which an individual faces negative consequences (such as job loss or public criticism) as a result of their online activity. The term has become a cautionary tale for those who write about their personal lives online and a reminder to be mindful of the potential risks and consequences of sharing too much personal information online.
Heather Armstrong wrote from the heart with wit and candor about this big messy thing called life. She shared both the raw and the sublime, and her insights were inspiring for her many readers.
I must confess that I had mixed feelings for Heather Hamilton in the past, I admired her at that time, and in the same time I didn’t like what she was doing, sharing too much of her family life. But eventually have realized that everyone has different boundaries when it comes to sharing personal information online.
What might be comfortable or acceptable for one person may not be for another. Additionally, have come to acknowledge that the online world can be complex, and there are often unseen consequences and challenges that come with being in the public eye.
Irreverent and sometimes profane, Dooce has cut to the core and no doubt helped countless readers feel seen in a world where, too often, being anything other than “ok” is seen as failure.
Ultimately, it’s up to each individual to decide what they are comfortable sharing and consuming online.
But that’s the question: was Heather really comfortable sharing all her and her family personal lives online? Don’t think so. I would rather think that is why she started to drink, to numb that voice that whispered in her ear that something was not right.
A turning point in her life was the separation and the the divorce from Jon Armstrong in 2012, her then husband and father of her daughters.
At the time, Heather Armstrong wrote about the experience on her blog, discussing the reasons for their separation and the challenges that came with it.
According to Heather, the divorce was the result of many years of growing apart and struggling to make their marriage work. She cited issues such as differences in personality, communication breakdowns, and the stress of managing their public personas and online businesses as factors that contributed to their separation.
Heather also wrote about the emotional toll that the divorce took on her and her family, including her struggles with depression and anxiety. Despite the challenges, she expressed a commitment to moving forward and rebuilding her life. And for while she really looked like she did.
Heather Hamilton (Dooce) has been open and candid about her experiences with alcohol and substance abuse.
In 2016, Heather wrote a blog post about her decision to enter a rehabilitation program for alcohol abuse. She discussed her struggles with addiction, as well as the stigma and shame that can often accompany seeking treatment.
Since then, Heather has been vocal about the importance of mental health awareness and seeking help when needed. She has shared her experiences with therapy, medication, and other forms of support, and has encouraged her readers to prioritize their own mental health and seek help if they are struggling.
Now Heather is dead. It’s important in her memory to approach the topic of addiction and substance abuse with empathy and understanding. Addiction is a complex and difficult issue that affects many people, and seeking help can be a challenging but important step in recovery. It’s important to support those who are struggling with addiction and to prioritize mental health and well-being for ourselves and those around us.
Heather’s (Dooce) journey may have ended, but her impact on the blogging world and her readers will not be forgotten. She was a pioneer in the blogging community and her honesty and vulnerability about her struggles with mental health and personal challenges helped to break down stigmas and open up conversations about difficult topics.
It’s a tragedy and my deepest condolences go out to her loved ones and those who were affected by her work.
read 5 Blogging Lessons I Have Learned from Dooce
When I die I want people to eat bean burritos with a side of homemade salsa and freshly fried tortilla chips. I want people to save the money they would have used to buy flowers and use it instead to tip 25% the next time they have someone serve them a meal. During that one small afternoon I want people to hug their dad and accept their mother in law and laugh when their four-year-old nephew acts like a four year old, for crying out loud.
And I want someone to play Mazzy Star’s “Blue Light” as they put my body in the ground.
Heather Armstrong /Dooce, 2001
I wonder if the family remembered this.
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